North Star

by Damien Page

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I need a North Star


I'm gonna kill myself eventually..
I feel it build like it's a habit that's instilled in me
I've been trying to warn my broken family
I hope they're happy. I hope they're happy.
I want to tell them it's okay if I just disappear
I fear existence.. I see my parents.
in my memory, letting me see the damage
They inflicted, but I cherished the pain, at least I had them.
They only paid attention when they bruise
So that's the muse that I use to retain you.
It's okay; let me tell the truth.
Music isn't therapy; it's a form of self-abuse
I don't have a reason to live.
Psychopathic, I should cease to exist
A black rose with poisoned tipped thorns.
Enjoyment left for... a reason I don't yet know.
abandon is growing, I'm feeling my whole skin
eroding, I'm closer to death than I know
but I've chosen to balance the weight using memory
that ruined everything.
All I want is a sanctum,
Serendipity or a reason to care explicitly
Please be luciferous...
If you're trying to help.. I lost light tossing pennies in a well.
I need a north star.
I need a north star.
Guide me in the dark.. find the tiny piece of heart in my body
and then inspire me to start.
Please.. I'm entirely at fault.
Threw myself to the pain and now this fire breeds my thoughts.
Platitudes.. I don't need them.
colloquialisms are for the children..
Results that they've given are non-existant..
Talking as if you understand me is different
I need you to listen.
I need you to listen.
That's the difference.


released March 20, 2017



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Damien Page Mesa, Arizona

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